Daughter Hates me & left home
[Replies:
5]
My daughter's 18th birthday is tomorrow. She left 5 days ago after an arguement. I wouldn't allow her to ly in bed until noon, and she proceeded to outburst (typical scenerio for her). I don't want to lose her, nor miss the remaining months/events of her senior year, but she has put us through the meatgrinder for 3 yrs now.
She has assaulted me several times, as well as her father. She jumped on my back to take something out of my hand the other day (a phone charger) and gripped my hands & across my face. I bit her hand to release her hand from my mouth & walked away. She charged at me to tackle me. I fled downstairs. She left & went straight to the police station to have me arrested. Since she has a history of assault with us, she is on probation & also has a non-abuse order against her that I had to file.
She hasn't been home since, and we aren't chasing her to come back. I just don't know what to do at this point. I am so sad that it's come to this, but at the same time I know I can no longer tolerate her disrespect & abusive behavior. It's taken it toll on the whole house, my younger daughter & my marriage. I haven't been able to go back to work, or barely leave my house because she brings kids in, etc. This kid has called me every name in the book & told me to F O on a daily basis.
I just spent umpteen hours applying her to college (& much $$$) in the hopes that she'd go & get it together - and hopefully return later realizing how good she has had it here. We've been in therapy for 2 1/2 yrs & reached out to every resource imaginable.
I know I shouldn't care what others think, but she is going around town throwing us under the bus as if we are these terrible, abusive, unreasonable people. I am embarrassed that someone else has taken her in & now caring for her. She's playing the victim & has never held any responsibility for anything; her poor grades, losing good job we got her, blowing off team, not doing anything for herself & still lying about disrespecting her family.
I was hoping she'd have grown out of this childish selfish thinking by now, but she's only regressed. I don't know what to do. Do I call the friends' parents & explain myself? How to spend her birthday? My husband is fed up also & doesn't care if she goes to college or not, in fact, would rather not scramble for the money to put her there at this point, since it is such a losing bet right now. So sad!
She has assaulted me several times, as well as her father. She jumped on my back to take something out of my hand the other day (a phone charger) and gripped my hands & across my face. I bit her hand to release her hand from my mouth & walked away. She charged at me to tackle me. I fled downstairs. She left & went straight to the police station to have me arrested. Since she has a history of assault with us, she is on probation & also has a non-abuse order against her that I had to file.
She hasn't been home since, and we aren't chasing her to come back. I just don't know what to do at this point. I am so sad that it's come to this, but at the same time I know I can no longer tolerate her disrespect & abusive behavior. It's taken it toll on the whole house, my younger daughter & my marriage. I haven't been able to go back to work, or barely leave my house because she brings kids in, etc. This kid has called me every name in the book & told me to F O on a daily basis.
I just spent umpteen hours applying her to college (& much $$$) in the hopes that she'd go & get it together - and hopefully return later realizing how good she has had it here. We've been in therapy for 2 1/2 yrs & reached out to every resource imaginable.
I know I shouldn't care what others think, but she is going around town throwing us under the bus as if we are these terrible, abusive, unreasonable people. I am embarrassed that someone else has taken her in & now caring for her. She's playing the victim & has never held any responsibility for anything; her poor grades, losing good job we got her, blowing off team, not doing anything for herself & still lying about disrespecting her family.
I was hoping she'd have grown out of this childish selfish thinking by now, but she's only regressed. I don't know what to do. Do I call the friends' parents & explain myself? How to spend her birthday? My husband is fed up also & doesn't care if she goes to college or not, in fact, would rather not scramble for the money to put her there at this point, since it is such a losing bet right now. So sad!
Last Post Jan 31, 2012 6:30 AM by:
mark202
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mark202
Posts:
1
From:
1191 Bowen Rd. #2 Elma, NY 14059
Registered:
1/18/12
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Mark_Manning08
Posts:
6
From:
1191 Bowen Rd. #2 Elma, NY 14059
Registered:
12/19/11
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Mark_Manning08
Posts:
6
From:
1191 Bowen Rd. #2 Elma, NY 14059
Registered:
12/19/11
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normat1211
Posts:
1
Registered:
12/23/11
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GARDENMOM
Posts:
1
From:
ST louis
Registered:
12/3/11
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FedUpMom
Posts:
5
From:
Boston
Registered:
2/10/11
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