please someone help me!!!! i have a 14 13 and 11 year old girls. things are fine between my 2 youngest but my oldest is a different story. i cant tell her anything that she doesn't blow up at me. when that happens i get upset and it goes down hill from there, what should i do please help
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Charlee
Posts:
8
From:
usa
Registered:
12/29/08
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(68 of 413)
Jan 25, 2009 12:17 AM
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fearfulmom71,
I'm trying to find people from this site that would like to get together and share our stores, give advice and support each other. It's terribly painful when our daughters feel hate for us. If you click on my name, you'll see that I've left an e-mail address. Please write me, I would dearly love to put together a group so that we can help and support each other.
My best,
Charlee
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Maureen
Posts:
604
Registered:
6/13/07
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(67 of 413)
Jan 20, 2009 4:11 PM
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Hi zepfan08, Keeping the conversation's focus to social web topics doesn't mean we think healthy parent-child relationships are unimportant to kids' online safety. Just the opposite - we know (and the research backs us up) that healthy parent-child relationships can be a huge factor in kids' online safety. But there are tons of great boards that allow parents to talk about their relationships with their kids (we've included links to several good ones in past posts on this thread), and very few like ours that allow people to come together to talk about how families are working through growing up and child-raising in the digital age.
Maureen
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Maureen Kochan
ConnectSafely community manager
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zepfan08
Posts:
1
Registered:
1/20/09
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(66 of 413)
Jan 20, 2009 3:21 AM
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Maureen:
You write that this is not an issue that concerns the safety of social networking sites, so you will not permit such discussions.
I can find nothing more important to the safety of our children -- particularly our young daughters -- than ensuring that they have positive, healthy relationships with their parents. Having open, honest relationships between parents and children will help to ensure that our daughters do not turn to the comfort of online anonymous friends -- and potential predators -- on the web who would be happy to step into a void where one might exist between parent and child.
Allowing parents a forum to discuss how to ensure positive relationships to prevent such tragedies should not be "prohibited" on this site.
If you honestly don't think healthy parent-child relationships are important to the safety of children on social networking sites, then you should not be involved in a site that purports to promote such safety.
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Edited by zepfan08 at 01/20/2009 3:23 AM
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Maureen
Posts:
604
Registered:
6/13/07
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(65 of 413)
Jan 17, 2009 3:13 PM
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Hi, everyone: Thank you for sharing these very personal stories, but this forum is for people to discuss safety on social websites like Facebook and Myspace. I'll have to start deleting posts that stray too far from the (important) subject at hand.
Thanks for your understanding!
Maureen
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Maureen Kochan
ConnectSafely community manager
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lostfamily
Posts:
1
From:
texas
Registered:
1/16/09
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(64 of 413)
Jan 16, 2009 6:29 AM
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i know how you feel because my daughter who is 17 with a pretty baby will listen to others and not me. MY DAUGHTER HAD A BABY AT 16 AND I DID NOT KNOW SHE WAS ACTIVE AND THE BABY BELONGS TO A 23YR OLD . HER FATHERS MOTHER CAME AND GOT HER FROM MY HOME WITHOUT MY CONSENT. AND HER FATHER HAS NEVER DONE NOTHING FOR HER EVER IN HER LIFE. I HAVE ANOTHER DAUGHTER WHO IS 7YRS OLD.ITS HURTS SO BAD. BUT WHAT ELSE IS THEIR TO DO WHEN YOU KNOW YOU WILL AND HAVE WENT TO THE END FOR YOUR DAUGHTER AND STILL WILL GO TO THE END . KEEP STRONG I TELL MYSELF AND KEEP GOD FIRST AND LET HIM TAKE OVER BECAUSE HE KNOWS WE HAVE DONE OUR BEST
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marcia
Posts:
1
From:
blakely,georgia
Registered:
12/30/08
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(63 of 413)
Dec 30, 2008 1:25 PM
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iknow how you feel, my daughter who is 15 has chose to listen to the many lies her father and stepmother choose to tell her. she has broken my heart and today told me she did not want to have anything else to do with me. we all have to account for all we do in life, and they to will have to account for theirs, its just horrible they chose to drag my daughter down with them.
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fearfulmom71
Posts:
1
Registered:
12/29/08
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(62 of 413)
Dec 29, 2008 3:40 PM
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I dont know hwat to do anymore , sometimes I feel like the worst mother in the world. I struggle with my oldest she believes that because she has a child of her own that she should be allowed to do whatever she wants... everything that I do is stupid and crazy we fight all the time... about her the baby whats right whats wrong.. it dosnt matter, I ready to just give up.
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Charlee
Posts:
8
From:
usa
Registered:
12/29/08
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(61 of 413)
Dec 29, 2008 3:37 AM
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Jacquie and others, I have a daughter that hates me also. It breaks my heart and like everyone here, I would love to chat with others that understand because they are going through the same. She lives with her father and he has done a super job at alienating her from me. For the past two years she has refused to speak to me or see me and I'm devastated. I understand that this is not the site for this particular discussion, so I've left an email address. If anyone has an idea where we can go to chat, or if you would like to email me, please feel free to do so. I would love to hear from you.
Sincerely,
A broken hearted mom
Charlee
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Jacquie
Posts:
3
From:
USA
Registered:
12/19/08
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(60 of 413)
Dec 19, 2008 8:36 AM
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I saw your posting, and had to laugh, for so many people are talking about the same subject. I guess we all need to go to another site and vent there. When I put my words in the browser of my computer. your site was the first to pop up. Curious eh?
All users who are talking about my child hates me, please lets discuss going somewhere else to discuss this particular issue. For I feel great talking about this finally with other people.
Respectfully!
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Jacquie
Posts:
3
From:
USA
Registered:
12/19/08
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(59 of 413)
Dec 19, 2008 8:31 AM
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Hi there,
I know how you feel, I'm right there with you. My daughter hates the way I chew, cook, look, etc......
She just tells me to shut up. Everyone tells me she needs consequences, but I've tried everything.
I guess we just need to be strong, and come here to vent, and go back into our own lives and be stronger, having let our feelings here. I wish I knew more, but wanted to let you know you are not alone in this situation.
Feel free to write me, and maybe two heads are better than one, eh?
Happy Holidays to you.
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Jacquie
Posts:
3
From:
USA
Registered:
12/19/08
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(58 of 413)
Dec 19, 2008 8:28 AM
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My daughter is 14.5 years old, has wonderful aspirations to become a doctor. She works very hard at her school work. She too was a great, warm and loving child. She would hug and kiss me all of the time. Now, everything I do she "hats"!
It cuts me to the core of my being when she says, sorry Mom but I really hate you today. You dress terrible, what not to wear, she is an only child. I could not have more due to my illnesses of breast cancer and numerous surgeries.
I don't want to be felt bad for, just understood. She has a great heart, but tough. My mom, said that one day I would have one just like me, for I gave her a hard time too. She has since past away, when my child was just 7 months old. My father died a few years prior, when I had just met my husband. It is so hard on me, I cried all the way home today from dropping her off from school.
This year is especially hard, for no money for gifts for holidays. My heart is just breaking, and sought somewhere to vent. I don't want the family to have ill feelings towards her, for hurting me.
Oh, I just don't know how to cope and handle this situation. I'm not stupid, just at a dead end.
Thank you all for allowing me to bear my soul.
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Angela
Posts:
1
From:
Michigan
Registered:
11/16/08
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(57 of 413)
Nov 17, 2008 12:10 AM
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I understand the pain you feel when a child you brought into the world turns on you. My daughter 43 was never a problem to me at all. A very good girl untill she started dateing. There have been 3 men in her life, the first her husband I begged her not to marry because he was a con man. I was right a yr after the wedding he divorced her and she was broken hearted.. he had a new girlfriend. The 2ed man was an even bigger con artist.. again we begged her not to get involved but she got pregnet and although she did not marry him, she stayed with him for 12 yrs. In that time she had to scrimp and scrap to pay for bills, food and so on. He was a raving alcoholic. Then one day I found out that my daughter had been arested for embeslement at her place of work.. she needed the money to pay bills or so she said. She was convicted and it was dropped to a misdaminor. It cost me 11,000 dollers to keep her out of jail, and pay her restitution. I talked to her and tried my best to help her start a new life. After 5 yrs I was going to pay to have her record expunged so that her job hunting would be easier for her.. and just before that was to happen she did it again. This time I refused to help. I did not post bail, I did not pay the restitution, but I told her I was there for her in every other way. I have called her, I have begged her to call me, I wanted her to stay with me when she got out of prision, but she said she felt uncomfortable and wanted to stay with her new found boy friend who is you can believe this is wores then the first two. She wont talk to her sisters, she ignores us all and I feel as If My daughter has died. I have begged her to come for holidays, her and her son, she wont even respond to me. My heart is broken, the pain is like knife in my heart. What can I do now. Please help me to figure this out.
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bbr1love
Posts:
3
From:
texas
Registered:
11/1/08
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(56 of 413)
Nov 1, 2008 7:58 PM
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she doesn't hate you! you just have to put yourself in her shoes and maybe there is something is making her this way like a problem!!!!
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Maureen
Posts:
604
Registered:
6/13/07
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(55 of 413)
Sep 5, 2008 11:09 AM
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Hi, all: Thanks for sharing such personal stories, but I have to remind everyone that this forum is for people - parents, teachers, legislators, law enforcement, anyone - who want to discuss safety issues involving social Web sites like MySpace and Facebook. Please contribute if you have a comment or question about one of these subjects - I'll have to start deleting posts that stray too far off topic. Thanks so much for your understanding, and we look forward to hearing from you. Maureen ~
Maureen Kochan
ConnectSafely forum manager |
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kamlesh
Posts:
1
From:
suva fiji
Registered:
9/4/08
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(54 of 413)
Sep 4, 2008 7:55 PM
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hi i have a daughter and she lives with her mum so i think in your case try to talk to her and explain how your other 2 grils are like and give her the best love.
i pray to god that every thing will be good soon.
thanks.
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