My original post in this thread is a transcription that has a number of quotes that I was responding to and were [blockquoted] indented and refererenced.

Is it possible to have that edited here?

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Edited by jbcoops at 06/21/2006 8:33 PM

Originally posted in our previous blog by:

Kevin Farnham
MySpace age
Mon Jun 5, 2006 7:32PM

You can still change your birth date for your MySpace account by selecting the "Basic Info" tab on the "Edit Profile" screen. So, you can still change your age to be 14 or 15.

As of a month ago or so, if you did this, you would then be able to make your profile private. But, MySpace is continuing to make changes to their system with respect to age and privacy protections and privileges.

At MySpaceSafetyTips.com we have a free 32-page PDF guide to using MySpace safely and responsibly, which includes detailed account settings recommendations.

I'll post that section...

Originally posted in our previous blog by:

Anonymous
Re: Things you can do.
Tue Jun 6, 2006 8:03AM

Hello Anne:

Thank you for your reply.

The computer monitoring service is geared to monitor everything. Our products cater to just about any sort of Internet activity that is currently out there on the Internet. It was an intentional decision from day one because the kind of dangers that children face online is ever growing. With most generalized monitoring software you will get a glimpse as to a persons computing habits, but our software does work much differently because we build our software upon the needs of our customer feedback. The customer feedback is from parents and they help and have a say with regards to our recording capabilities. Because it is capable of monitoring everything that is done on the computer, you can easily see any kind of social networking activity from places like Myspace.com. The company I am employed at does understand places like Myspace is a growing concern among parents and have incorporated some recording options specifically to Myspace.com. Personally, I have to admit that having only a Social Networking safe guard in place is a negative. You would only be able to record one thing and as we all know, the Internet can often be Pandora’s Box.

Example:

You have a child that has been on Myspace.com. You understand that they had an account and have educated them on the basics such as never providing personal identifiable information online.

Then you install monitoring software and begin to record what they are doing online. You find out through the recordings that for the myspace account they told you about, they have been on the level with you and staying within the safety guidelines you have requested.

However, you then find in the recordings that they have another Myspace account and they are posting personal information in that profile. Information like, where they live, what school they attend, and so on. You also find in the recordings that they have registered that account as an adult, so there would not be any restrictions. In fact they have actually met adults through myspace, and are now staying in touch via AIM, or Yahoo messenger. You then begin to read chat conversations that are adult in nature and your child is about to have an “in person” meeting with this adult. This kind of situation happens every day.

If a person was to rely solely on social networking monitoring, they could be missing out on something like the above example. Missing out on something like that is dangerous to the welfare of the child.

To specifically answer your question about YouTube and Tagged, etc..

Yes, our software is quite capable of recording activity from sources like that as well. With one of our products, you have seven built in tools that record all activity simultaneously. One option is the ability to visually record anything that is on the monitor and allow you to play it back like you would a movie on a VCR. In that visual detail, you will be able to see the videos that they are viewing. Additionally, the programs we offer also have the ability to record every web site visited. That means if they go to youtube.com and watch a video, the exact URL may be recorded. This would apply for and of the pages they visit within the youtube.com domain as well. This also applies to tagged.com as well.

I must say that such an emphasis has been placed on social networking sites over the past year or two, that several of the parents that I speak to focus on that one specific issue. While that may very well be the most popular thing that is in the news, it should not be the only concern that a parent has with regards to protecting their children online.

Regards,

Michael Goldberg

Originally posted in our previous blog by:

Jeff Cooper
re: Snoopware
Tue Jun 6, 2006 5:40PM

Dear Michael,

Thanks for your articulate response. Obviously we are two sides of a coin here. Let me reply to your post:

There are many generalized terms for monitoring a computer, snoopware is one of them. It would not be my choice to call a software that, but it is a common reference. I would prefer to call it what it is, computer monitoring software.

I use the term "snoopware" because it is accurate, even though it has a negative connotation, which I also believe is accurate. Obviously you are in the biz, and have a neutral term associated with it. The bottom line though is there isn't any "positive" term that really is associated with it. I supposed you could call it "safetyware"... that might work better for you.

If you are up front about it and the child is aware of it, trust should not be an issue because you are not doing anything behind their backs. They might not like it at all, but I think we can all agree that children do not always like it when Mom or Dad set up rules they may not necessarily agree with.

To an extent I agree with you. However, a number of parents won't tell their kids or talk to them about it, they'll just do it. This is really unfortunate but you know it's going to happen. For those parents that *do* talk to their kids about it, I think they are becoming more than parents, they're becoming "Big Brother." If I were a kid, and wanted to talk to my friends about school, or even *my parents*, I would feel extremely uncomfortable knowing that my parents could read anything that I wrote. It would have a tremendous chilling effect. Now, as you mention, your company has a way of mitigating what is monitored, which is great. Obviously if that was the case, there may be ways to adjust it so that some conversations remained private (for example, with trusted friends). I am certainly in favor of finding ways to prevent kids from speaking with complete strangers without any intervention or awareness on the part of the parent. I think we need to find a way to meet in the middle on this.

I would want to know who my child is talking to online because I may not know that person at all. It could be a friend or a relative. It could also be a person that has mal intent, or a known sexual predator, or a drug dealer. Certainly nobody is going to trust people like that around their children offline, why take that chance when they are online? For me, its not worth the risk to not know that kind of information.

This also comes down to what software you're letting your children use. If you have Yahoo Instant Messenger it is possible to archive all chats. Personally, I'd like to see YIM (and all other IMs) set it so that you could set up accounts for your kids, and not allow archives to be deleted except by the parent. This way, I could go in and check who has spoken with my kid, see what was said if necessary, and question my kid. Of course, kids have the tech savvy to turn this off if they want, and many parents don't know it exists at all. My point here is I'd rather use a tool that already exists, and make my kid know that I may in fact go in and check, rather than hovering over their shoulder with the knowledge that everything they're saying would very well be read. It's a fine line between the existing system set up and what you offer. But to me it's a difference between Big Brother and parenting.

However, I would want to know who my child is talking to online because I may not know that person at all.

Again, we're not in major disagreement here, but methodology and psychological differences are important. For parents to be "Big Brother" would have a chilling effect on what the kids do or say online, as well as their relationship with their parents. Do you recommend tapping the phone as well? Because it's a very similar thing isn't it? The ability to listen in to their phone calls with whomever. It is a fine line between what action will create a safer environment for kids and what will drive them further underground and into more dangerous waters. I believe tha snoopware *for some kids* will definitely have this effect. In other words, it will be counterproductive. This is not to say that it will have that impact for all or even most of them. And indeed, it may save a life... who is to say? At the same time, it is feeding into the atmosphere of fear and not giving positive alternatives for kids to consider when online.

What about parents that are not afraid of “tech”, yet they are not “computer experts” and need assistance with keeping an eye on their kids Internet activity?

I'm not sure they do need assistance. If the kid runs across anything uncomfortable or dangerous, if they're approached by a stranger, shouldn't they already have a "virtual red button" to push and inform their parent? Or are we protecting kids who are completely unsavvy as to what is going on, i.e. just the completely naive kids? What is a better solution... to help the kids make consistently good choices or to give them a false sense of security that snoopware (and filters) will protect them? Already a number of students feel that if a site isn't filtered at school, it must be ok to view. Is that he sort of naivete we want to instill in our kids... the inability to think critically, logically, and safely? To not be able to discern between appropriate and inappropriate based on what some software tells them? And again, the message being sent that "whatever you say or do may be monitored and come back and haunt you"... again... is this the message to spread?

Finally... yes there is the tech consideration. Although you say your program is completely safe, I'm sure there are other keystroke monitoring programs that aren't... that somehow your information could be spread into the cyberworld. Identity theft, etc. is known to kids today as a major problem. The fact that everything they say or do or visit online could come back and bite them is indeed a real fear. I personally don't want their surfing habits based on fear, and yet I do understand that some parents really want to make their kids behave in a certain way because that is their way of parenting. I just feel that parenting this way is not the truly responsible way to go, and that those who do are misguided in their belief that it is.

Regards,

Jeff Cooper

Originally posted in our previous blog by:

Anonymous
re: Things you can do (snoopware)
Tue Jun 6, 2006 12:20PM

Wow this information is really useful for a lot of people. I use computer tracking software to keep an eye on my son and see nothing wrong with it. Its called Spector Pro and is a huge time saver. Great topic and nice to see people are concerned about what their kids are doing online.

Originally posted in our previous blog by:

Michael Goldberg
Things you can do.
Tue Jun 6, 2006 5:33AM

Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Michael Goldberg and I am employed at a leading monitoring software company. Part of my daily routine is to search the internet and get a pulse on what parents are saying and I have been to this web site several times, and was not aware that their was a message board. It is an excellent idea for parents to have an open line of communications with experts in the fields.

At this time I do not wish to omit the name of the company I am employed with because I am not sure if it is acceptable or not, I would like to discuss a few key concerns.

Myspace (as you know) is not the best place for a child to be. Unfortunatley children often tend to go there anyway. I am not sure if anyone has mentioned this, but there is a way that children are getting around the entire age verification process.

I will not say that all kids do this, but a lot of them are now creating multiple accounts on myspace. One parents know about and another they have not shared with Mom or Dad. This is very easy to do, in fact it only takes a few mouse clicks to acomplish this.

This is a growing trend and I have heard it from thousands of parents via phone calls and emails. While I beleive that Myspace is doing it's best to remedy their issues, the overall response that I have heard is that parents do not want to take the chance with their child and wait for them to fix it.

As I stated in the beginning of this post, I work for an Internet monitoring software company and though I might show bias to Internet monitoring in general, I really do beleive that with little regulated Internet Laws designed to protect children, parents need to assume control of the situation.

With the moderators approval, I would like to occasionally post responses to some of the threads if I may help. I am not trying to promote anything other than awareness to parents as Myspace is not going away anytime soon.

Best Regards,

Michael Goldberg